...well, no news!
Just wanted to let you know we are all still here! ;) and still in need of your continued prayers and support! We are in the process of looking into more fundraisers (especially ones that don't require upfront costs) and also currently applying for a couple of grants, so please be in prayer for that. We still don't know how or when, but we do KNOW God will provide and in His perfect timing. Please also be praying for our future child's health as well as his or her birth family for their strength, health, and safety!
We have been so blessed in the year 2011. We can't wait to see how God continues to stretch us and provide for us. We are looking forward to 2012 and seeing what He has in store for the Dean family!
Love you guys!
P.S. Be on the lookout for info on an upcoming raffle!
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Thursday, November 3, 2011
infertility
I came across this video tonight, and felt compelled to share. It really encompasses the emotions felt while struggling with infertility (that still can sneak up on us from time to time - even on the road to adoption!). I felt compelled to share it - to help others struggling with infertility know they are not alone & to help others better understand what their friends and loved ones are experiencing as they struggle with infertility.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Homestudy #2, 3 & 4 and where we are now!
Catchy title, huh!
Sorry for the delay on the posts. You could say things have been crazy around here - and I'm sure that's nothing compared to what it will be like when baby arrives!
Typically the homestudy process (aside from the initial paperwork) can last about 2-4 months depending on the family and caseworker's schedules (at least with our agency). Generally couples will have 4-8 interviews. In our case we had 3 meetings, but 4 interviews. The first meeting (I talked about in an earlier post) was at the end of August, we went over the results of our Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis results.
In our second meeting, our caseworker met with us at home to create and discuss our genograms. A genogram is basically a family tree. We made one for each of our families and discussed family member characteristics, relationships, and dynamics. I really gained a lot of insight during this time with our caseworker and studying our genograms. I was able to see where I have gotten certain characteristics as well as grasp a better understanding of how we want our child(ren) to be raised by looking back at specific relationships and events in each of our lives.
Our third and fourth interviews actually took place on the same day at our home (about a week after our 2nd interview). She also came to our home for this meeting. She met with us individually (which is considered 2 interviews) and we discussed various things from where we are in the grieving process from infertility to what we are looking forward to the most about being parents to specific strengths and weaknesses in our marriage. Afterward, she met with the two of us to discuss how we answered each of her questions - and we were right on! Either we are amazing at communication or did a great job coaching each other on what to say beforehand! ;)
During this process, our caseworker also took a look at our home - to verify we had the number of bedrooms, bathrooms, etc we had indicated on our form. She also wrote down the type of flooring, landscaping, etc. Then she is also required to be sure any firearms are stored properly as well as checking for gates around pools.
So the big questions.... where are we in the process now? and when do we get to bring our baby home?
Where are we in the process now? We are currently waiting for our caseworker to compile all of the information she gathered during the homestudy process and write a report. She then shares it with the staff at the agency and then will send it off to the courts for certification! So in the meantime, she has asked us to get our matchbook letter ready for October!
When do we get to bring our baby home? Once we are in the matchbook next month, it could literally be ANY day! The average wait is 1 year, but our caseworker thinks it could be sooner! :) Honestly, your guess is as good as ours! I can faithfully say that God has chosen a perfect baby for us, and he or she will bless our home in God's perfect timing!
When we were attending the adoption classes, 1 couple that spoke to us about their experience with adoption actually had both of their daughters at home within 5 weeks of being in the matchbook! The first adoption was a hospital call I believe, where a birth mother had given birth and decided at the hospital she was ready to place her baby for adoption! The 2nd adoption, they were matched with a birth mom who was about 8 months pregnant just after being in the matchbook again, but baby decided to come earlier!
There's also a very real possibility we could be matched with a birth mom, and she could change her mind or something could change in her situation to where she would be able to parent her child and provide a safe and loving home. In that case we would be heartbroken, but know that this particular baby wasn't meant to be a physical part of our family, but will probably always be in our hearts and prayers. We can only trust (and let go of the handlebars!) in God's perfect plan and hope we were able to make a positive impact in that family's life - or it may be we will forever be impacted by our experience with them!
Sorry for the delay on the posts. You could say things have been crazy around here - and I'm sure that's nothing compared to what it will be like when baby arrives!
Typically the homestudy process (aside from the initial paperwork) can last about 2-4 months depending on the family and caseworker's schedules (at least with our agency). Generally couples will have 4-8 interviews. In our case we had 3 meetings, but 4 interviews. The first meeting (I talked about in an earlier post) was at the end of August, we went over the results of our Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis results.
In our second meeting, our caseworker met with us at home to create and discuss our genograms. A genogram is basically a family tree. We made one for each of our families and discussed family member characteristics, relationships, and dynamics. I really gained a lot of insight during this time with our caseworker and studying our genograms. I was able to see where I have gotten certain characteristics as well as grasp a better understanding of how we want our child(ren) to be raised by looking back at specific relationships and events in each of our lives.
Our third and fourth interviews actually took place on the same day at our home (about a week after our 2nd interview). She also came to our home for this meeting. She met with us individually (which is considered 2 interviews) and we discussed various things from where we are in the grieving process from infertility to what we are looking forward to the most about being parents to specific strengths and weaknesses in our marriage. Afterward, she met with the two of us to discuss how we answered each of her questions - and we were right on! Either we are amazing at communication or did a great job coaching each other on what to say beforehand! ;)
During this process, our caseworker also took a look at our home - to verify we had the number of bedrooms, bathrooms, etc we had indicated on our form. She also wrote down the type of flooring, landscaping, etc. Then she is also required to be sure any firearms are stored properly as well as checking for gates around pools.
So the big questions.... where are we in the process now? and when do we get to bring our baby home?
Where are we in the process now? We are currently waiting for our caseworker to compile all of the information she gathered during the homestudy process and write a report. She then shares it with the staff at the agency and then will send it off to the courts for certification! So in the meantime, she has asked us to get our matchbook letter ready for October!
When do we get to bring our baby home? Once we are in the matchbook next month, it could literally be ANY day! The average wait is 1 year, but our caseworker thinks it could be sooner! :) Honestly, your guess is as good as ours! I can faithfully say that God has chosen a perfect baby for us, and he or she will bless our home in God's perfect timing!
When we were attending the adoption classes, 1 couple that spoke to us about their experience with adoption actually had both of their daughters at home within 5 weeks of being in the matchbook! The first adoption was a hospital call I believe, where a birth mother had given birth and decided at the hospital she was ready to place her baby for adoption! The 2nd adoption, they were matched with a birth mom who was about 8 months pregnant just after being in the matchbook again, but baby decided to come earlier!
There's also a very real possibility we could be matched with a birth mom, and she could change her mind or something could change in her situation to where she would be able to parent her child and provide a safe and loving home. In that case we would be heartbroken, but know that this particular baby wasn't meant to be a physical part of our family, but will probably always be in our hearts and prayers. We can only trust (and let go of the handlebars!) in God's perfect plan and hope we were able to make a positive impact in that family's life - or it may be we will forever be impacted by our experience with them!
"My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says the Lord.
"And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so my ways are higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts."
Isaiah 55:8-9 NLT
We don't have any idea what God has in
store for us in these next few months or so, but we do know He has
something wonderful planned regardless of how it happens for He makes
all things work together for the good of those who love Him (Romans
8:28).
Please continue to pray for protection
for our baby as he or she is growing and developing, pray for our baby's
birth mom and her situation, and pray for our strength as we patiently
wait for God's perfect plan to unfold in every aspect of this adoption
from finances to timing!
Monday, September 12, 2011
Gold Canyon Candle Fundraiser!
Who doesn't love candles?! Fall is here! The holidays are
approaching! Time to fill your house with some yummy new scents and begin to stock up on Christmas gifts for your loved ones!
We are selling the best candles around - Gold Canyon Candles!
There are 15 amazing scents to choose from:
-Apple Spice
-Autumn Walk
-Cinnamon Vanilla
-Clean Sheets
-Cozy Christmas
-Cranberry Orange
-Days of Christmas
-Holiday Wreath
-Moroccan Amber Vanilla
-Mulled Cider
-Pomegranate
-Pumpkin Pie
-Sugar Cookie
-Sweet Pea
-Warm Welcome
Available Prices/Sizes:
26oz - $25 (best value!), 16oz - $21.50, & 8oz - $17
40% of your purchase goes to our adoption fund!! Please contact us if you'd like to get some awesome candles!
We are selling the best candles around - Gold Canyon Candles!
There are 15 amazing scents to choose from:
-Apple Spice
-Autumn Walk
-Cinnamon Vanilla
-Clean Sheets
-Cozy Christmas
-Cranberry Orange
-Days of Christmas
-Holiday Wreath
-Moroccan Amber Vanilla
-Mulled Cider
-Pomegranate
-Pumpkin Pie
-Sugar Cookie
-Sweet Pea
-Warm Welcome
Available Prices/Sizes:
26oz - $25 (best value!), 16oz - $21.50, & 8oz - $17
40% of your purchase goes to our adoption fund!! Please contact us if you'd like to get some awesome candles!
Monday, September 5, 2011
Delay of Gratification
Most of us, if we're honest with ourselves, aren't fans of delayed gratification. Let's face it, we live in an instantaneous society and as technology progresses, our frustrations with delays will only grow. Everything should happen in our time: NOW! Right?!
God doesn't always work that way, and He has a great reason for it.
I was listening to the radio the other day and briefly heard the DJ talking about a blog he had read. The author of the blog offered something to think about:
Let's say you have a friend who is always on time for every lunch date with you. He or she is the epitome of punctuality. Then one day, after years of arriving on time, he/she is late. What are your thoughts? Are you worried? Do you fear something happened? Or do you get angry and disgusted with that person?
More than likely you are worried and would probably try calling them. You wouldn't dare be angry at a dear friend who doesn't show up on your time? Hmm.... but isn't that what we do to God when He doesn't "show up" on OUR time or immediately when we call out to Him?
When YOUR plans fall through or take an abrupt turn You weren't planning for, do you cry out in anger and doubt, or do you patiently wait on His timing? More often than I'd like to admit, the latter doesn't occur nearly as often as it should in my response to trials in my own life.
Suzanne Scheppmann relates this to Old Faithful.
God doesn't always work that way, and He has a great reason for it.
I was listening to the radio the other day and briefly heard the DJ talking about a blog he had read. The author of the blog offered something to think about:
Let's say you have a friend who is always on time for every lunch date with you. He or she is the epitome of punctuality. Then one day, after years of arriving on time, he/she is late. What are your thoughts? Are you worried? Do you fear something happened? Or do you get angry and disgusted with that person?
More than likely you are worried and would probably try calling them. You wouldn't dare be angry at a dear friend who doesn't show up on your time? Hmm.... but isn't that what we do to God when He doesn't "show up" on OUR time or immediately when we call out to Him?
When YOUR plans fall through or take an abrupt turn You weren't planning for, do you cry out in anger and doubt, or do you patiently wait on His timing? More often than I'd like to admit, the latter doesn't occur nearly as often as it should in my response to trials in my own life.
Suzanne Scheppmann relates this to Old Faithful.
Jesus loves us, but that doesn't always translate to Him responding in faithfulness to our time schedule. The geyser, Old Faithful, demonstrates this truth to us. The park guide explained that after the earthquakes in 1959, 1983, and 1998, the average length between the geyser's eruptions increased. Where it once was about 76 minutes, it is now approximately 90 minutes between eruptions. Just like Old Faithful, I have found that as God increases my faith, He sometimes increases the time between my "earthquake" and His rescue. If and when a longer time span does occur between crisis and aid, it allows me to anticipate and depend on His yet unseen faithfulness."
Check out the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead in John 11:1-45. Jesus' friends called out to Him when their brother was dying to heal him. He didn't go immediately, as they hoped He would have, but instead, he waited 2 days before He even began on the journey to Bethany. Upon His arrival, He was greeted with words like, "If only you would have been here sooner...", instead of "Thank you!" They were disappointed because He did not show up on their time. They were unable to see what God could see. All they could see was that Lazarus had already died. He went with Lazarus' sisters to the burial site, where a crowd had gathered. He, after weeping, raises Lazarus from the dead, at which the people are overjoyed and BELIEVED when they saw God at work!
When our earthquakes hit, God might delay. Maybe the delay is to grow our faith. Maybe the delay is so others can see God's glory. In either case, His timing is always perfect.
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore, we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging...
Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth. Psalm 46:1-3, 10
Monday, August 29, 2011
Homestudy #1
Wahoo! We are making progress in the process once again. It's nice to be out of waiting and moving toward the next phase of waiting!
Today we met with our caseworker. This was the first of 4-8 meetings with her before we can be certified. We went over the results of our Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis Tests, which we turned in as part of our homestudy packet well over a month ago. For the most part, I would agree with the results of the test, some parts not so much, but it's used more to start a discussion about our temperament and personalities rather than to decide whether or not we are perfect and fit to be parents! It was interesting that focusing or lack of, came up in the discussion as this is one thing I've more recently felt convicted of.
Here's how my mind works when cleaning for example - Start working on the laundry. While hanging clothes in the laundry room, spot the vacuum. Stop doing laundry and start to vacuum. Notice the window on the back door is smudged with doggy nose prints. Stop vacuuming and clean windows. Go to throw out the paper towels and notice the garbage is full. Take out garbage...... and so on (not to mention being distracted by my phone or the computer!).
During our meeting with our caseworker, we discussed my impulsiveness/lack of focus. Afterward, she asked us another question about our personalities. I began answering and midway through my thought I had to stop and ask her what the question was again!
See what my poor, organized, self-disciplined husband has to deal with!
Now where was I.... Oh yeah - the homestudy, part 1! ;)
That was about it for our hour-long meeting today. We will be meeting with her at our home next week to go over family histories/dynamics, and I'm guessing she will take a look at our house some as well.
Thanks for your continued prayers and support - please add a prayer for my ability to focus! :)
Today we met with our caseworker. This was the first of 4-8 meetings with her before we can be certified. We went over the results of our Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis Tests, which we turned in as part of our homestudy packet well over a month ago. For the most part, I would agree with the results of the test, some parts not so much, but it's used more to start a discussion about our temperament and personalities rather than to decide whether or not we are perfect and fit to be parents! It was interesting that focusing or lack of, came up in the discussion as this is one thing I've more recently felt convicted of.
Here's how my mind works when cleaning for example - Start working on the laundry. While hanging clothes in the laundry room, spot the vacuum. Stop doing laundry and start to vacuum. Notice the window on the back door is smudged with doggy nose prints. Stop vacuuming and clean windows. Go to throw out the paper towels and notice the garbage is full. Take out garbage...... and so on (not to mention being distracted by my phone or the computer!).
During our meeting with our caseworker, we discussed my impulsiveness/lack of focus. Afterward, she asked us another question about our personalities. I began answering and midway through my thought I had to stop and ask her what the question was again!
See what my poor, organized, self-disciplined husband has to deal with!
Now where was I.... Oh yeah - the homestudy, part 1! ;)
That was about it for our hour-long meeting today. We will be meeting with her at our home next week to go over family histories/dynamics, and I'm guessing she will take a look at our house some as well.
Thanks for your continued prayers and support - please add a prayer for my ability to focus! :)
Monday, August 15, 2011
Discount Cards Fundraiser
We are now selling XF Platinum MVP cards. These cards are only $20 each and allow you discounts at several local places which you can take advantage of over and over again! Plus you receive a free $25 gift certificate to restaurant.com!! Check them out here*.
You can access even more deals online with the ID code listed on your card! If you are out of state, you can still purchase cards! Go to www.xtramandiscounts.com and enter your zip code to see all of the amazing deals available to you!
For those of you who live nearby, you can present your cards at these places as well to receive some great deals!
-Baci Italian Bistro, Uncle Bear's, Quiznos, Baskin Robbins, Rudy's Restaurant, Cantina Laredo, Jiffy Lube, Discount Golf, Red White & Brew, Tailgater's Grill, Denny's, and Del Peiro
Please let us know if you would like to purchase one. If you are out of state, please use our "Donate" button on the left side of our blog, and be sure to leave us a note that you are wanting to purchase a discount card or you can purchase a card directly from their secured site - http://xtramanteam.com/clubdancestudio.aspx*.
Thanks for your support!
*Please disregard the "Club Dance Studio" logo on the front of the cards, these are actually a No Handlebars fundraiser! :) The owner had extras we could purchase from her to then raise money for our adoption fund. It was cheaper for us to transfer the cards than it was to create new ones.
You can access even more deals online with the ID code listed on your card! If you are out of state, you can still purchase cards! Go to www.xtramandiscounts.com and enter your zip code to see all of the amazing deals available to you!
For those of you who live nearby, you can present your cards at these places as well to receive some great deals!
-Baci Italian Bistro, Uncle Bear's, Quiznos, Baskin Robbins, Rudy's Restaurant, Cantina Laredo, Jiffy Lube, Discount Golf, Red White & Brew, Tailgater's Grill, Denny's, and Del Peiro
Please let us know if you would like to purchase one. If you are out of state, please use our "Donate" button on the left side of our blog, and be sure to leave us a note that you are wanting to purchase a discount card or you can purchase a card directly from their secured site - http://xtramanteam.com/clubdancestudio.aspx*.
Thanks for your support!
*Please disregard the "Club Dance Studio" logo on the front of the cards, these are actually a No Handlebars fundraiser! :) The owner had extras we could purchase from her to then raise money for our adoption fund. It was cheaper for us to transfer the cards than it was to create new ones.
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